KEEPING finances separate is one strategy married couples use to remain financially independent, but it can also cause problems.
One 50 year old called into a financial advice podcast to ask how to deal with a heavy secret.
Becky, from Bristol, Virginia, called The Dave Ramsey Show to ask how to eliminate her debts in advance of retirement.
$85,000 of her $100,000 debt was a complete secret to her husband.
Becky said she and her spouse split their finances after declaring bankruptcy 20 years ago.
Her husband, she said, was a saver, while she was a spender.
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Now, two decades after getting out of their previous financial catastrophe, Becky had six figures of debts and one big secret.
THE SITUATION
Calling the Ramsey show hosts, Becky said she realized something needed to change as she overdrew her checking account to pay off the minimum amount on her credit cards.
With a full time job and driving for Doordash on the side, she made $38,000 a year.
Despite her lower than average pay, she maintained steep spending habits.
“I was buying anything and everything I wanted,” she said. “If my mom needed help, I’d just give her a credit card.”
All the while, her husband was saving money, even paying off the couple’s house.
She told the hosts she did not want to reveal her secret.
“I do not want to tell him and I don’t want to ask him to help me.”
Budgeting expert Rachel Cruze told Becky she had little choice.
“You do realize you’re gonna have to tell him,” she said.
Becky reiterated that she wanted to avoid opening up about her debts.
Co-host George Kamel chimed in with relationship advice.
“I just can’t imagine having a healthy marriage going forward while you keep this secret,” he said.
The pair of finance experts agreed that Becky needed to have the “excruciating” conversation with her husband.
“It’s going to be a season of rebuilding trust,” Cruze said.
The hosts speculated that Becky may have an addiction to spending. If you or someone you know is struggling with addiction or compulsive buying, help is available.
MORE RETIREMENT TIPS
Millions of Americans are aging with no retirement savings.
While Social Security exists to support retirees, it’s often too little to maintain someone’s lifestyle into retirement.
Some have been left working well into their 70s without retirement savings, though there are still steps they can take to stave off disaster.
Even wealthier Americans are not immune to retirement concerns.
A couple in their 60s with $4.1 million is still facing “concern.”
Some use 401ks to save, but even that can fall short.
The U.S. Sun has compiled five ways to save for your golden years.