Ah, February—the month where heart-shaped chocolates and overpriced roses reign supreme. But let’s ditch the clichés and dive into a more profound exploration of love, aligned with the Lead in 3D framework. We’ll journey through the Me (holistic well-being), We (leading teams and families), and World (community engagement) dimensions, uncovering practical and perhaps slightly irreverent ways to infuse genuine love into each.
Me: Beyond Bubble Baths—Cultivating Holistic Self-Love
Self-care has become synonymous with spa days and scented candles. While there’s nothing wrong with pampering yourself, true self-love demands a deeper dive. It’s about embracing every facet of who you are, even the bits you’d prefer to hide.
Consider this: instead of scheduling a massage, take time to confront and challenge negative self-talk. Or whatever bugaboo you’ve got that you know isn’t helpful, and yet… Engaging in practices like journaling can help you gain deeper self-awareness and acceptance.
Another favorite of mine is spending time in nature, which offers unexpected but well-documented therapeutic benefits. Simply standing outside (if conditions permit in your part of the world, or at least out the window!) and looking at the sky, trees, or a body of water, helps us to stay present and re-orient away from worries. Of course, if horses are involved, the magic is exponentially multiplied!
Self-love has been watered down to feel-good moments, but let’s be real: real self-love is messy, uncomfortable, and requires work. It’s about honoring yourself when things get tough, showing up even when you don’t feel like it, and setting boundaries that protect your well-being.
Reflection Questions:
- How do I speak to myself when I make mistakes? Would I talk to a close friend that way?
- Where am I overcommitting out of obligation rather than genuine desire?
- What is one thing my body, mind, or soul has been asking for that I’ve been ignoring?
Experiments to Try:
- Radical Self-Compassion Challenge – For one week, catch every self-critical thought and reframe it as if you were speaking to a loved one. Notice how this shifts your mindset.
- Stop Shoulding – Every time you hear yourself (or someone else) saying ‘I should…’, restate the sentence as ‘I would love to…’ If that new frame doesn’t feel true, consider letting go of that activity.
- Digital Detox & Presence Experiment – I am loving Catherine Price’s Break Up With Your Phone challenge.
We: Leading with Love in Teams and Families
In professional and personal settings, love often takes a backseat to efficiency and productivity. Yet, leading with love can transform these environments. Jen Croneberger shares an approachable framework for how to do it.
Research indicates that teams operating on a foundation of love foster trust, respect, and compassion, leading to psychological safety—a key ingredient for innovation and healthy communication.
In family settings, leading with love means embracing vulnerability and open communication. By acknowledging our imperfections and sharing our experiences, we create an environment where every member feels valued and understood.
Dr. Tal Ben-Shahar, a fellow Harvard grad and global expert on happiness, writes eloquently about love in our personal relationships. “Nephew therapy” is another fun example of a reframe to find new sources and forms of love in our family context.
Leading with love isn’t about being “soft.” It’s about being clear, direct, and invested in the well-being of those around you. Whether you’re leading a company, a family, or a group of friends, love is about how you show up.
Reflection Questions:
- How often do I listen to respond rather than to understand?
- Do I make it emotionally safe for people to tell me the truth, even when it’s uncomfortable?
- In my closest relationships (at work or home), have I clearly communicated what I appreciate about others?
Experiments to Try:
- The Listening Upgrade – In your next conversation, focus on listening to understand, rather than preparing a response. Summarize what the other person said before giving your thoughts.
- The Five Acknowledgments Challenge – Every day for a week, tell five different people something you genuinely appreciate about them. Make it specific.
- Assumption Detox – Notice a moment when you assume someone’s actions are negative. Instead of reacting, ask a clarifying question. Example: Instead of thinking, They ignored my email, ask, Hey, I wanted to follow up—did you get a chance to see my note?
World: Spreading Love Within Our Communities
Extending love beyond our immediate circles can have a ripple effect, fostering positive change in broader communities.
You might’ve noticed Choose Love emblazoned on helmets and the field if you watched the big game on Sunday. Organizations like the Jesse Lewis Choose Love Movement have attracted major global partners, including the NFL, by promoting social-emotional learning and character education to create safer, more connected communities. The organization’s work is scientifically grounded, referring to the neurotransmitters dopamine, oxytocin, serotonin, and endorphins, but wisely starts with a simple, and universally human premise: Choose Love.
Love at the community level means showing up—not just when it’s easy, but when it’s inconvenient. It’s about contributing to something larger than yourself and recognizing that even small actions can have a ripple effect. And doing so not out of pity, but out of a sense of shared humanity and affection for others’ struggles, with the recognition that they could help you with yours tomorrow, next year, or in some other way.
Reflection Questions:
- Where do I already contribute to my community, and where could I do more?
- Who in my world feels unseen, and how can I acknowledge them?
- How can I use my unique skills and resources to uplift others?
Experiments to Try:
- The Unexpected Gratitude Project – Send a note, text, or voice message to someone you haven’t connected with in a while, telling them why they’ve impacted you.
- The ‘Do One Thing’ Rule – Each day, do one small act of service: Hold the door for someone, buy coffee for a stranger, leave a kind comment online.
- 30-Minute Micro-Volunteering – Pick an organization you care about and dedicate just 30 minutes of your time this month. Many nonprofits have quick ways to contribute, from writing encouragement letters to mentoring online.
Embracing love in the Me, We, and World dimensions challenges us to move beyond superficial gestures. It’s about fostering genuine connections, practicing radical acceptance, and leading with compassion.
So, this February, let’s redefine love—not as a fleeting emotion but as a transformative force in every dimension of our lives.
Love isn’t just a feeling—it’s a practice. It’s the decisions we make every day to choose compassion over cynicism, connection over isolation, and courage over comfort.
This month, I challenge you to put love into action: for yourself, for those around you, and for the world. You might just be surprised at how much shifts when you lead with love.
Which love experiment are you trying first? Drop a comment or share your experience—I’d love to hear!