“So, how’s work going?”
If you’re dreading that question this holiday season, you’re not alone. Things can get awkward fast when you’re sitting at the family dinner table or mingling at a friend’s holiday party, especially when you’re unhappy in your career. Somehow, the conversation always seems to pivot to “What do you do?” or “How’s work going?” The very topic you’d much rather avoid.
Take it from someone who used to scurry to the restroom, hoping the topic would shift to something more exciting—like the latest Netflix show—by the time I returned. When you love your job, talking about work is easy. But when you’re talented and capable, yet not where you want to be in your career, it’s hard not to feel frustrated—or even embarrassed—when the topic comes up.
Here’s the good news: you don’t have to fake a smile or hide in the restroom this holiday season. Instead of dreading these conversations, you can use them to your advantage. When done right, those casual career chats can spark curiosity, open doors, and even lead to new opportunities. Here’s how to confidently navigate them—and maybe even land your next job in the process.
Keep it short and simple.
If you typically resort to giving a crash course on your company or sharing how much you hate your job, it’s time to try something new. You don’t need to explain your company’s mission or dive into every project your team is working on this quarter. You definitely don’t need to reveal all the reasons you’re thinking about quitting your job, either.
Instead, keep it simple and focus on you. Share one key element of your career that feels meaningful to you right now or that gives context to your experience. This can be your title or a specific part of your job that you enjoy. If you’re in between roles or connecting with someone new, highlight the years you’ve spent in your industry or an accomplishment you’ve been known for in previous roles.
Share what’s next for you.
It might be tempting to say, “I’m looking for new opportunities,” but try to avoid this. Instead, after you’ve shared a key detail about your career, be clear, specific, and direct about what you’d like to do next. This subtle approach lets others know how they can connect you to contacts or opportunities that align with your goals—without you having to ask or feel like you’re begging.
Not sure how specific to get? Here’s my advice: mention the job title you’re aiming for and any details about the type of company that fits your interests and expertise. The more specific you are, the easier it will be for others to think of you when they hear about something that matches your ideal role. Plus, you’ll save yourself from awkward interviews recommended by your aunt for jobs that have nothing to do with your career goals.
Here’s how it works in real life.
Picture this: you’re at a friend’s party, casually chatting with someone you just met. The conversation shifts from how you both know the host to the dreaded topic—careers. Instead of feeling awkward, you smile and say: “Oh, I’m currently a product manager, but I’m planning my next move—looking to transition into a senior role at a fintech company soon.” Or, if you’re in between roles, you might say: “I’ve been in product management for about 7 years, and my goal right now is to step into a senior role at a fintech company soon.”
Both responses highlight your experience, make your goals clear, and subtly signal how others can help—without you having to ask. Best of all, they keep the conversation light, easygoing, and focused on what you’re excited about next.
Quick, confident, and clear conversations like these can help you discover new roles and land job interviews—all while enjoying pecan pie. In fact, casual chats like this helped one of my clients land a vice president role with a 50% salary increase. So, no more dashing off to the restroom or dreading career questions. Responding with clarity and confidence could be the key to securing a new role you’ll love.
Adunola Adeshola coaches high-achievers on how to take their careers to the next level and secure new jobs they love without applying 24/7, starting over or settling for less. Grab her guide on how to land job offers.