A young leader once shared a story that both shocked and amused me. She recounted her experience with a manager notorious for his lack of familiarity with his team—he never remembered their birthdays. One day, she received an email from him wishing her a happy birthday, which took her by surprise. When she expressed her gratitude, his response was, “Oh, that! I have this new app that sends out automatic birthday emails to everyone on my calendar. You’re welcome!” While his intentions may have been heartfelt, his actions certainly came across as insincere.
This story immediately reminded me of Michael Scott, the lovable yet often misguided character from The Office. In the episode titled “Scott’s Tots,” he makes a heartfelt promise to a group of underprivileged students, vowing to pay for their education upon graduation. However, years later, he realizes he can’t afford to fulfill that promise. Believing he must still inspire them, he attends their graduation. Initially thrilled by their praise, he ultimately faces disappointment when the reality of his unfulfilled commitment becomes clear. It’s a classic example of good intentions overshadowed by poor accountability.
The Paradox of Good Intentions
In my experience coaching executives, I’ve come to see that most leaders truly have good intentions. Many seek leadership roles as a calling or as a means to create a positive impact. Of course, some may be promoted beyond their level of competence, illustrating the Peter Principle. However, many aspiring leaders pursue these roles for the right reasons, especially in a time when leadership positions perhaps are less desired.
But are leaders generally in sync with what is expected of them and how they are perceived by others? An analysis by Merryck & Co. and the Barrett Values Centre of 500 leaders revealed that the top areas leaders identified in themselves as needing work had hardly any similarity with what their peers and key colleagues saw as areas for development for them. This can results in a significant erosion of trust, which is already at alarmingly low levels.
Misguided intentions underscore that the root of the issue often lies not in a leader’s inherent character—since no one is born with a predisposition to be a poor leader—but in factors like perspective, education, and prioritization. This can also be attributed to a self-enhancement bias, where leaders see themselves in an overly favorable light, assuming their judgments are rational, accurate, and free from bias. As a result, they may overlook the skills they lack or the behaviors they display. Consequently, well-intentioned leaders may be perceived as ineffective, often without understanding the reasons behind this perception or recognizing the behaviors contributing to it.
Consider research from Gallup that shows that although nearly 60% of managers feel they are doing a good job recognizing their team’s hard work and contributions, only about a third of individual contributors (35%) share the same sentiment.
Such misunderstandings can lead to a situation where leaders think they are being supportive, while employees feel undervalued or unheard. Below are three actionable steps that can clarify your leadership philosophy and demonstrate genuine commitment to your team:
1. Know Your Leadership Blind Spots
Leaders often have a strong sense of their own strengths but may lack awareness of how those strengths are perceived and experienced by others. While everyone possesses unique qualities—whether it’s being an excellent planner, a visionary thinker or someone who easily connects with others on an emotional level—those same strengths can sometimes be seen as weaknesses when overused. For example, meticulously planning every detail might leave little room for team input, dreaming up grand visions could lack practical grounding, or forming deep connections with a select few might unintentionally alienate others.
These blind spots can significantly influence how others perceive and engage with you—and addressing them can be a game changer in your ability to positively impact your followers.
Recognizing Your Blind Spots: Begin by reflecting on your strengths. Ask yourself: What am I naturally good at? Where do I consistently excel? Which actions genuinely reflect my leadership style? Then, consider how those same positive traits might unintentionally create challenges or make others feel disconnected.
Vulnerability: Engage your team in honest conversations. Share your insights about your leadership style, including the rationale behind your actions and decisions. Highlight how your strengths contribute to the team’s success while acknowledging where unintended impacts might arise.
Seeking and Embracing Feedback: The key to addressing potential misunderstandings lies in inviting candid feedback. Ask your team how your behaviors affect collaboration and what you can do to ensure your strengths help rather than hinder their experience.
2. Be Crystal Clear About Your Expectations
Ineffective leaders prioritize commands over coaching, measurement over motivation, and demands over development. While good leaders recognize the need to establish clear expectations, they sometimes neglect to follow up and continuously clarify direction and strategy, even after those expectations are set.
In contrast, great leaders prioritize clarity of expectations on a daily basis by staying in sync with ground-level realities. They achieve this through ongoing dialogue, feedback, discussions and even constructive debate.
Ongoing Expectation Clarity: As a leader, it’s easy to assume that everyone is aware of what is expected of them, especially since these expectations are detailed in job descriptions and monitored regularly. However, in a time of rapid change, expectations must be flexible and evolve to keep pace with shifting business, market and organizational conditions. Team members may have initially grasped your expectations, yet they can feel a disconnect between those expectations and the realities of their daily tasks.
Consistent Cadence of Communication: This should include goal-setting, quick check-ins, feedback sessions, developmental coaching and collaborative progress reviews. Ensure these conversations are constructive and positive. It’s not merely about demanding updates on progress; it’s about guiding employees toward a clear understanding of the vision, mission and work expectations. Regular communication demonstrates openness to critique and adaptability, fostering trust and alignment.
3. Don’t Be a Micromanager
Leaders can often be unintentionally perceived as micromanagers. While micromanagement is typically associated with excessive and obsessive involvement in employees’ tasks, Gallup research reveals that the issue is not too much involvement, but rather too little. The majority of employees report a lack of high-quality feedback. In a pursuit to achieve personal goals, leaders may focus intensely on monitoring work without providing the coaching, support, or constructive feedback employees need.
Additionally, in striving to drive performance in a high-pressure environment, leaders may also inadvertently prioritize outcomes over employee wellbeing. In the rush to meet targets, there’s a tendency to pressure teams to work harder, which can normalize a culture of long hours and overwork, sometimes even making them seem like badges of honor.
Become a Better Coach: Leaders who focus aggressively on performance outcomes without providing sufficient coaching, support and development risk significantly undermining their team’s effectiveness. To address this, leaders must cultivate trust in their teams, shifting their approach from controlling to guiding. Mastering coaching as a core leadership competency is the first step toward achieving this balance.
Prioritize Wellbeing: Over time, excessive workload can erode the wellbeing of employees and the sustainability of performance. Leaders must strike a balance between driving results and promoting a healthy, supportive work environment.
Know When to Step Back: Recognize when close supervision is necessary and when it would be more beneficial for the team to operate independently. Understanding this balance fosters a more empowering and productive work environment.
Shaping Misguided Intentions Into Proactive Plans
Confronting your blind spots or challenging your intentions is not about diminishing who you are, but about gaining insight into how your leadership is experienced by others. By staying authentic while being mindful of others’ perceptions, you foster an environment of trust and openness. This approach not only reflects your commitment to serving your team and organization but also reinforces your focus on collective success rather than personal agendas.
As the comical and poignant episodes in the life of Michael Scott show, while good intentions are undoubtedly important, effective leadership requires adaptability, self-awareness and a focus on empowering others. By honing these skills, leaders can transform misguided intentions into meaningful actions that inspire trust, collaboration and success.